‘I was addicted to cutting myself’
An inquiry has found more help should be given to young people who self-harm, while, in a new treatment approach, one hospital’s scheme will allow patients who self harm to do so under supervision.
Sophia Gill, a 26-year-old former sufferer, told the BBC how and why she began to cut herself.
I was 14, I was really depressed - possibly because of exams, or just the pressures that every 14 year old has.
I know now it was a side effect of manic depression.
It’s a really weird connection, but sadly it made things seem easier to deal with.
I self-harmed for eight months completely in silence - like everyone who self-harms does.
You cover it up, you make sure no-one sees it, you wear long sleeves in the summer, all the classic things.
It wasn’t until I tried to kill myself and ended up in hospital that the self-harm came out.
I don’t self-harm anymore, but it took 11 years or more for me to get over it.
A lot of people do think it’s just attention-seeking.
I guess in some ways I had a varied response from people.
Some were really understanding and I was very lucky - like the health team that I saw in hospital.
But occasionally I’d go into hospital with some cuts and the nurses who were treating me made me feel like a time-wasting teenager.
In some ways, to do it under supervision is better because they are going to be cutting themselves with clean blades, and can get help straight away.
By allowing them to do that, it’s showing that you respect them, that it’s an addiction and it’s not something you can just snap out of.
- Source: BBC, Mar. 26, 2006
Alot of the problem used to be letting people know wen this was occuring due to the stigma and shame attached to self harming oneself.
True. But has it now become easier to share this with people? If so, what changed?
I went through a cutting phase myself and still have the scars to show for it. I used to cut my upper arms which made it easier to hide under shortsleeved tops. But my mom found out by accident. She scolded me and I my dad grounded me for a week. Sure I stopped cutting my arms but I started cutting where I knew they wouldn’t notice: my breasts. Lots of girls do that and that’s a shame because like I said the scars remain.
I stopped cutting after a boyfriend who is now long gone taught me to respect myself just as I am.
I told my mum and she thinks its just a phase and I can “snap out of it”, I can’t and the main thing stopping me getting help is the fear that people will think that I am attention seeking.
Sorry to hear that Jim. I also could not stop and my parents reacted the same way as your mom did. At the advice of aunt who did not want to get involved hereself I went to the school counselor. She took me seriously and she did not think I was seeking attention. She contacted my parents for a talk. Then they understood. That evening I secretly cut because I was hurt that they beleived a total stranger instead of me. But they got me into counseling and that realy helped me. I have not cut in over 3 years!
You could go to someone at school as well, or even to your family doctor or to a counseling doctor you find in the phone book. You can also find and print articles online that may help your mom understand what is going on.
Stay cool!
Kayla, I also used to cut my boobs and sometimes the insides of my thighs. Too bad because like you say the marks stay long after you’ve outgrown the problem.
How cool to see that a boy friend taught you self-respect!
Love,
Elizabeth